Whatever You Nurture Will Multiply

I remember one of my childhood experiences at 181 Mechanized infantry Battalion, Bida, Niger State, Nigeria. My mother, Mrs. Mary Ogidi (resting with the Lord in glory) sent me on an errand to buy some foodstuffs at the Mami market (a market usually located within military or Para-military formations in Nigeria). Upon return, she gave me two kuli-kuli (groundnut cake), though I was expecting just one kuli-kuli. I asked her the reason for giving me two instead of the conventional format of one kuli-kuli (or another snack) as a reward for obedience. She said it was because she forgot to reward my last act of obedience. So, she multiplied the number of snacks because she felt it’s appropriate to nurture my obedient acts. On the other hand, the same can be said for penalties.

Rewards are multiplied when obedience is nurtured. Likewise, penalties and ill[1]treatment are multiplied when disobedience is nurtured. Needless to say, whatsoever you choose to nurture in your heart will express itself either as a reward or ill-treatment.

A husband who nurtures his wife’s weaknesses and wrongs will find it difficult to escape meting ill-treatment or having ill feelings about his wife. Likewise, a woman who is possessed with the wrongs of her husband may find it difficult to upgrade or nurture her love for her husband. To flourish in love, couples need to nurture their strengths more than they do with their weaknesses; nurturing your spouse’s strength gives you the impetus to generously reward him/her with encomium and gifts that expresses your appreciation for his/her value in your marriage. The multiplying effects in actions are revealed knowledge of nurtured content.

What you nurture over time will find expression in your action, sooner than later. Sometimes, people nurture assumptions about their spouses. The assumptions may be true or false. A story was told of a newly-wed couple; a man locked his wife out of the house and instructed the security man not to open the gate for her. Further instruction to the security man was that he should “tell her to go back to where she is coming from,” then he switched off his phone. The following morning the husband was invited by his father-in-law to his house for questioning. His reason shocked the father-in-law, and I guess it will shock you too. The man said while the wife was late in returning from work, he was nurturing the assumption that she must have been having sex with her boss or colleague in the office to warrant staying late at work. According to him, some friends had told him that wives who claim to stay late at work compromise their marital vows.

So, the more he nurtured that counsel, the more annoyed he was while nurturing the assumption that his wife could be in the office committing adultery. That was what infuriated him to lock her out. This confirms that nurturing assumption(s) can cause avoidable bad omen in marriage. Therefore, when you are experiencing strains and bad omen in your marriage, be sure to evaluate the stuff you have been nurturing about your spouse, your assumptions of his/her actions, reward mechanisms for his/her strength, and like my mother will always do, multiply rewards to keep your marriage flourishing because whatsoever you reward, you nurture into dividends.

Please follow and like us: